[Wii] Super Mario Galaxy - "Birth" (Replacement) by IN_sanity

Started by Zeta, October 25, 2017, 05:33:50 PM

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Zeta

Submission Information:

Series: Super Mario
Game: Super Mario Galaxy
Console: Nintendo Wii
Title: Birth
Instrumentation Solo Piano
Arranger: IN_sanity


Replacement Information:

Links to Existing Sheet: MUS | MIDI | PDF
Replacement Type: Edit (existing arranger remains)

[attachment deleted by admin]

[attachment deleted by admin]

Latios212

Thanks, this needed a bit of a touch-up! :)

There's still more polishing to do, though.
- Composer. Just Mahito Yokota here.
- Key. Best to keep the key signature F major throughout. Even in the intro it resolves to F in the second measure.
- Dynamics. There's a diminuendo written in measure 7 but the volume drops off way before then, starting in measure 4. And for the looped section I would suggest p, maybe mp at loudest. Mezzoforte seems a bit much for the piano solo.
- Rhythm groupings. Be sure to split up notes into two tied notes in order to show where beat 3 lies. This needs to be fixed in measures 12 (LH) and 21 (RH).
- Clef changes. These ones that fall in between beamed eighth notes look quite awkward. See if you can fiddle with them to make those parts look a bit nicer.
- Double barlines. I don't think they perform much of a function where they're currently placed, so I'd opt to get rid of them and insert one at the end of measure 7, where the song enters the loop.
- 8vb. I would recommend a line extending under the whole measure instead of just one note.
- Pedal. All the pedal markings are hidden on the sheet, so I would indicate pedal so the performer can see it (a simple "con pedale" at the beginning should suffice).

(Posting the original here for reference)

My arrangements and YouTube channel!

Quote from: Dudeman on February 22, 2016, 10:16:37 AM
who needs education when you can have WAIFUS!!!!!

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turtle

IN_sanity

Thank you for your suggestions! The issues are fixed, including a rhythm regrouping in 13LH.
Math is fun. Can't you see how beautiful and elegant...


...is?

Sebastian

Nice work!
Few things:
- Wrong url for the copyright info. It should be http://www.ninsheetmusic.org/
- If you want, you can remove "Nintendo EAD Tokyo." Not a big deal either way. I just find that part of the copyright info redundant.
- Some courtesy accidentals would be great: F in the RH (M. 13), Bb in the RH and E in the LH (M. 17), G in the RH (M. 21), and F in the RH (M. 22).
Quote from: Latios212 on November 05, 2017, 08:15:08 PM- Double barlines. I don't think they perform much of a function where they're currently placed, so I'd opt to get rid of them and insert one at the end of measure 7, where the song enters the loop.
I wouldn't remove the barlines for two reasons:
1. I like where those barlines are placed. Personally, I would've done the same thing. 2. This is someone else's arrangement. Nacho's preference (like my own) would be to keep them. If this was Insanity's arrangement, then it'd be a different story.

Haven't checked the notes yet. I'll check those when I'm able to.




Maelstrom

I'm against the double barlines. There isn't a clear distinction between the two sections. At least, not enough to warrant a barline. As for Nacho's preferences, I'm not sure they matter. He isn't here, and his arrangements clearly need revisions. If it's not the place for them, they don't belong.

Sebastian

Double barlines show a major change in the music, such as a new musical section new key/time signature, BPM change (before a Tempo or Tempo I), and sometimes occurs with del segno and del capo.
I don't see an issue with taking them out, but popular opinion won't change the fact that they are correctly used in this instance.




Latios212

Alright let's take a look here:



The tempo is loose in the first system, and the first and second double barlines don't denote a significant change in tempo as one would normally expect from a new section: it's more just taking your time to emphasize each note. And the third one is unnecessary since we've agreed the whole thing is in F. Basically, each of these short phrases currently denoted with double barlines are all part of the intro to the song, which can be differentiated form the looping part using double barlines.

Yeah, each pair of measures uses a different musical idea/pattern than the others, but ultimately what I want to say is that the double barlines lose their meaning if they're used every other measure. I don't see a good reason to chunk the intro like this, especially since the whole thing flows together. I'd be saying the same thing to Nacho.
My arrangements and YouTube channel!

Quote from: Dudeman on February 22, 2016, 10:16:37 AM
who needs education when you can have WAIFUS!!!!!

Spoiler
[close]
turtle

Sebastian

Quote from: Latios212 on November 13, 2017, 09:32:56 AMThe tempo is loose in the first system, and the first and second double barlines don't denote a significant change in tempo as one would normally expect from a new section: it's more just taking your time to emphasize each note. And the third one is unnecessary since we've agreed the whole thing is in F. Basically, each of these short phrases currently denoted with double barlines are all part of the intro to the song, which can be differentiated form the looping part using double barlines.
Yeah, I agree. Also, I wasn't talking about the third barline (at the key change) since the key change was removed.

Quote from: Latios212 on November 13, 2017, 09:32:56 AMYeah, each pair of measures uses a different musical idea/pattern than the others, but ultimately what I want to say is that the double barlines lose their meaning if they're used every other measure. I don't see a good reason to chunk the intro like this, especially since the whole thing flows together. I'd be saying the same thing to Nacho.
It's really not that big of a deal. Two barlines aren't gonna "lose their meaning" only being placed twice. Lots of Jazz music uses barlines every however many measures (not quite sure how many offhand...maybe every phrase or period), so they don't lose meaning.
I believe this sheet is fine without them. I was just making a point about double barlines since they seem to be shoved off as meaningless more often than not.



The Deku Trombonist

Quote from: Maelstrom on November 13, 2017, 07:33:42 AMAs for Nacho's preferences, I'm not sure they matter. He isn't here, and his arrangements clearly need revisions.
Let's see...
Last Active: November 13, 2017, 03:03:00 PM (yesterday, my time)

Maybe send him a courtesy message and ask him?

Maelstrom

Woops. It slipped my mind that the nacho on recently is the same as the ancient one. My bad.

Sebastian

Quote from: Sebastian on November 12, 2017, 01:03:29 PMNice work!
Few things:
- Wrong url for the copyright info. It should be http://www.ninsheetmusic.org/
- If you want, you can remove "Nintendo EAD Tokyo." Not a big deal either way. I just find that part of the copyright info redundant.
- Some courtesy accidentals would be great: F in the RH (M. 13), Bb in the RH and E in the LH (M. 17), G in the RH (M. 21), and F in the RH (M. 22).I wouldn't remove the barlines for two reasons:
1. I like where those barlines are placed. Personally, I would've done the same thing. 2. This is someone else's arrangement. Nacho's preference (like my own) would be to keep them. If this was Insanity's arrangement, then it'd be a different story.

Haven't checked the notes yet. I'll check those when I'm able to.
In addition to this, here are some note errors and other random things that need to be fixed:

- The half note is missing a Bb in M. 18 (RH; first beat).
- There should be a Bb and a D on both RH notes in M. 19.
- The Bb in M. 21 should be a D.
- There is a G missing in the second chord of M. 22.
- The Bb on beat 1.0 should be a C in M. 23 (LH).
- F courtesy accidental needed in M. 13 (RH).
- F and B courtesy accidental needed in M. 22 (RH).
- Formatting is a wreck. I'd be happy to fix that if you wish.



IN_sanity

Updated.

Quote from: Sebastian on December 01, 2017, 03:32:23 PM- There should be a Bb and a D on both RH notes in M. 19.
The D coincides with the D on LH.

Quote from: Sebastian on December 01, 2017, 03:32:23 PM- The Bb on beat 1.0 should be a C in M. 23 (LH).
I agree but I do hear a Bb somewhere. Could be a residue from the previous bar though.

Quote from: Sebastian on December 01, 2017, 03:32:23 PM- Formatting is a wreck. I'd be happy to fix that if you wish.
I tried something, but I don't know if I fixed the problem.
I would also want to know what the final verdict is on the double barlines.
Math is fun. Can't you see how beautiful and elegant...


...is?

nacho2420

Just saw this. (Yes, I am the ancient nacho who was revived via Nintendo Switch lol). Personally, I don't care what you do with the double bar line, it won't make a difference on how the performer will interpret the music imo. I'm back after a long hiatus so I also don't know whether my name will stay on the arrangement or not, but either way I'm cool with it, as long as the music stays available to print and play on the site I'm happy :)

Latios212

Alright, thank you both!

Sebastian and I have done a final pass on this to spruce up the visuals a bit, so check this out:

https://www.dropbox.com/s/1ed1thrz9pxo7nw/Super%20Mario%20Galaxy%20-%20Birth.mus?dl=1

All that's left is to update the files and we're good!
My arrangements and YouTube channel!

Quote from: Dudeman on February 22, 2016, 10:16:37 AM
who needs education when you can have WAIFUS!!!!!

Spoiler
[close]
turtle

Sebastian