triforceguy1's first arrangement

[Echo]

Well, the sheet's off at such a bad start to be honest... A complete redo would be better. It's off-key/out of tune, for one, and I'm pretty sure even the time sig isn't right. Tempo's way off too, and it just feels empty and weak. I really don't think this is a song for beginning arrangers, since the chord work really makes this song, and finding out the notes of a chord can be overwhelming. Not gonna lie, I would seriously restart or pick a different song.

Oh, and sorry if this post sounds rude or discouraging, I'm not trying to come across that way.

[mantis985]

But you didn't tell him anything at all!! All you told him was that it was totally wrong. He knows he needs to improve on that stuff, but he doesn't know how... Wow, way to fail, Gamer.

I agree with Gooch....

[Echo]

Um... Ok, I'm kinda on Gamer's side on this one. If it was a small error, like only a few notes wrong, then sure, it wouldn't be that much of a hassle to spend some time yourself to help correct it. In this case though, almost everything about the sheet is wrong. So for Gamer to help fix which parts need correcting, he would pretty much have to do the whole sheet himself.

...Which is why I pretty much just arranged it myself just now. But I won't post it. Instead I'll give some tips:

For the time sig I put it in cut time (C with a line through it, or 2/2), and 120 is a good tempo (it might slightly accelerate near the end though). The first and second notes for the left hand is a C and a G, and the first note for the right hand is a Bb. The melody at the start is weird, I put a half note with three dots (maybe write it out as a dotted half note tied to a dotted 8th note), and then a 16th note. The rest is easy to figure out, since it moves chromatically pretty much. For the right hand, it's all in dyads except for 16th notes and measures 1, 2, 5, and 6. They're all in fourths too, except for the last chord which is a third. Oh yeah, and pay attention to the left hand part, it's not the same throughout the whole song.

[Nakah]

Congratulations, you just figured out what to improve on.

   Hahaha, I actually agree with Gamer though. I listened to it and thought how I had to picture the music playing in order to convince myself that this sounded like it. It was extremely simplistic, when the actual theme should be far more haunting and forceful. I think you should begin with a new composition when you have more experience with this.

[Gooch]

What was wrong w/ gamer's post was that he just told him it was horribly wrong, he didn't tell him how to correct anything or give him any tips on how to improve. I agree w/ gamer that it doesn't sound right, that it needs to be upped in so many other levels and places, but i don't agree w/ the fact that he just told him it was horribly wrong and nothing else.

[KefkaticFanatic]

I don't want to waste my time telling him each individual note to fix, that would take me hours.  You're just trying to take advantage of the situation to make me look like an idiot.  As Echo said, the only way for me to be more helpful would be to do the whole thing myself, which maybe he wants to do, but I don't.

[Gooch]

I didn't sit here and tell you how to fix every single little note. I told you you ought to have been a tad more helpful in your initial post. No, im not trying to make you look like an idiot.

[Nintendude73]

I hate to agree with gamer (and I really mean HATE), but this song just really needs some serious work.  Rejected, sorry.

[KefkaticFanatic]

:O Since when have you joined the club?

[triforceguy1]

few months ago