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Messages - InsigTurtle

Pages: [1] 2 3 ... 99
I would keep it as 2+2+2+2+2 unless you decide to rebeam the other 4/4 section to fit it, which could also work

Hmm, maybe make the first two measures 5/4, then you'd have a 2/4 measure before going back to 3/4. That way, you'd introduce each measure with the sixteenth-sixteenth-eighth pattern.

- I'd try and find another way to incorporate the bass into this - what you have right now in the bass for m.9-14 sounds a bit like random plonks
- You're missing some of the dotted quarter - eighth - dotted quarter - eighth rhythm in the bass in the intro
- Eb's should be D#'s
- m.12 -> in the RH I'm hearing A C E B D# F# (following the previous pattern)

This is looking very close, but the time signatures here are still a bit of an issue. In both the intro and m.19-21, you need to be consistent in how you accent the motif, since it doesn't sound like it changes in the original. The beat pattern in the intro is also rather strange, although no matter what, it's going to be a bit messy.
Whatever you choose, think about how a performer would play it: what would be the most intuitive way to show how where the accents fall so that the performer gets the feel of the music?
(unless you're Stravinsky)

Bump for arranger!
I'm not a fan of the current notation in m.12 and m.16 – as is, it looks like the whole thing is the melody, when it's just the top note of the first and last chords

Hey, Bloop: Would your entry happen to be inspired by Rachmaninoff's Isle of the Dead? I'm just wondering because of the ostinato and time signature you used, and also because that was one of my inspirations.

Also, I got pretty lazy with this one. When I slowed down Chasm Cave's theme, I noticed it was pretty much identical to one of the motifs used in the Rite of Spring. In "Spring Rounds" there's a part that uses this motif, and then proceeds to use something that sounds like Hidden Highland from PMD2. Essentially, I tried to make up for the lack of content with a double reference.

Archive / Re: [PC] Doki Doki Literature Club! - "My Confession" by NPbus_
« on: February 23, 2018, 03:52:43 AM »
But remember that 6/4 chords have a tendency to resolve. When you invert it, you introduce more harmonic tension, so you can't simply invert a chord and call it the same as the root position chord - they have different functions. You also disrupt the bass movement when you do so. I do agree that other spellings are rather problematic here, though.

All that being said, I'm just giving some things to think about when you arrange in the future. While I'd personally go with an open voicing here, it's not my job to convince someone else to use that voicing if their voicing is also valid.

m.60 - I'd make it more clear when the melody comes in (right now it's almost indistinguishable from the accompaniment, even with the beam break)
Bass notes clash with copyright on PDF
m.27 1st RH melody note should be F# not A

m.2 last RH dyad is B-E, not C-E. Likewise for 6 and so forth.
Sounds like some missing harmonies in parts like m.5-12

Archive / Re: [PC] Doki Doki Literature Club! - "My Confession" by NPbus_
« on: February 22, 2018, 03:40:27 AM »
m. 22 RH dyad is F-C not F-D
As said before, omitting the D in m.19 causes that chord to lose its *oomph*. Normally, I'd advise against inverting those chords there (hides the 6-7-1 in the bass), but it's your choice.

m.8 and likewise: sounds like you're missing the G below the B in the RH
m.41-44 and its repeat: not hearing the G in RH, hearing DF and CE instead of FG and EG

Submissions / Re: [SNES] Mario Paint - "Title Theme" by Nine Lives
« on: February 22, 2018, 03:01:37 AM »
m.82 bass: I'm hearing D - C#, then 83. D - A. Haven't done a thorough checking yet it seems good

Forum Games / Re: The CTRL-V Game!
« on: February 22, 2018, 12:48:11 AM »

Archive / Re: [NDS] Pokémon Ranger: Shadows of Almia - "Caves" by Trasdegi
« on: February 16, 2018, 12:24:04 PM »
*cough cough* definitely not me *cough cough*

I'll need to listen to this again when I'm not sleep-deprived, but I'm currently hearing Gb-C for m.20 beat 4 and A-C for m.22 beat 2. Will check again later when I have time.

The strings are indeed quite loud though, sometimes almost overpowering the melody, so you should maybe tinker around to see if you can fit them in. If not, that's alright.

- Tenutos (Bar 36 being a good example) There are many times throughout where you have lots of tenuto markings over spread LH held chords. Just thinking logistically, there's going to naturally be a ton of pedalling so they start to look like unnecessary extra clutter on the score, if that makes sense.

- F sharp acciaccatura (bar 36) Given that it's the sole low note below a gliss chord, it'll naturally be quite ahead of the rest if it were just notated as part of the chord.

- Bar 38 diminuendo going to p, the p is a bit off position

- Bar 2 I don't think the re-statement of piano is needed because it's the same as the intro (stated 1 bar before) and is also the dynamic before the repeat (stated 4 bars before)
m.2 was a whoopsie. That was supposed to be hidden.
m.36 grace note was an artifact from when i didn't have a gliss, fixed the p.
Here, I'm not using the "hold for the full length" definition, but the "stress/play slightly louder" definition for the tenuto. (Blame Rach for getting me in that habit). But I did get rid of some I deemed unnecessary.
Might I suggest reworking the measure distribution a little bit to avoid it being really stretched out in some places?
Yep. I did that so that the new section at m.18 would be on a new page, making it appropriate for a page turn.

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