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NinSheetMusic => Submission Center => Submission Archive => Topic started by: Zeta on June 23, 2018, 11:17:18 PM

Title: [NDS] Phoenix Wright: Ace Attorney: Trials and Tribulations - "Detention Center ~ Elegy of the Detai
Post by: Zeta on June 23, 2018, 11:17:18 PM
Submission Information:

Series: Ace Attorney
Game: Phoenix Wright: Ace Attorney: Trials and Tribulations
Console: Nintendo DS
Title: Detention Center ~ Elegy of the Detained
Instrumentation Solo Piano
Arranger: Onionleaf (https://www.ninsheetmusic.org/forum/index.php?action=profile;u=3620)

[attachment deleted by admin]
Title: Re: [NDS] Phoenix Wright: Ace Attorney: Trials and Tribulations - "Detention Center ~ Elegy of the D
Post by: Onionleaf on June 23, 2018, 11:21:33 PM

Sorry for not getting back sooner with the changes (quoted below). Olimar's link was broken when I checked it today... whatever else needs to be changed, please let me know and I'll fix it asap.

QuoteFinal notes (I think):

-Even in 6/8, you can still beam 10-13 in 3/4 without a time change. That's not unusual to see in pieces like this. Personally I think it would be easier to read that way. Up to you.
-Measures 15 and 17 have a harmony of G minor, so the A#'s need to be Bb's.
-Measures 18-19 have a harmony of E half diminished, so the A#'s need to be Bb's.
-The second layer in 10-13 doesn't capture the harmonic changes from the original as well as it could, and I think this is because of the inversions you used. I would recommend that you rewrite it to maintain the lowest voice as the bass as it was in the original. The B in 11 should also be a C, which is also contributing to this.
-In adition to the above bullet, the LH in that section is also a contributor to that issue. Methinks that should be much higher, like where the bells would naturally sound. They also contain more notes than just the root and fifth (check out my example below).
-I think the dynamics could use some tweaking. Piano seams more appropriate for the outer two sections. The section at 10 could come up some more since it is so different.

Below is a version of this sheet with the suggested changes listed above. Use it as you please: https://www.dropbox.com/s/8quc1ncokehv95a/elegy12345.mus?dl=1
Title: Re: [NDS] Phoenix Wright: Ace Attorney: Trials and Tribulations - "Detention Center ~ Elegy of the D
Post by: Sebastian on June 25, 2018, 06:15:08 AM
Awesome. Go ahead and message Olimar on Discord or shoot him a pm. See if he still has that file.

Hopefully, we can finish this one up quickly.
Title: Re: [NDS] Phoenix Wright: Ace Attorney: Trials and Tribulations - "Detention Center ~ Elegy of the D
Post by: Olimar12345 on June 28, 2018, 03:36:45 PM
Found it: https://www.dropbox.com/s/nwfow8k8j4d4atc/elegy12345.mus?dl=1
Title: Re: [NDS] Phoenix Wright: Ace Attorney: Trials and Tribulations - "Detention Center ~ Elegy of the D
Post by: Sebastian on June 28, 2018, 03:48:56 PM
Thanks!

@Onion:
Go ahead and check that file out. See what you think. Then we can move from there.
Title: Re: [NDS] Phoenix Wright: Ace Attorney: Trials and Tribulations - "Detention Center ~ Elegy of the D
Post by: Onionleaf on June 29, 2018, 02:19:04 AM
Awesome! I can see the reasons for each change made and they all make sense. :) I've updated the files with your edited version.
Title: Re: [NDS] Phoenix Wright: Ace Attorney: Trials and Tribulations - "Detention Center ~ Elegy of the D
Post by: Sebastian on June 30, 2018, 05:51:50 AM
Great. I'll double check quick when I get to my PC...
Title: Re: [NDS] Phoenix Wright: Ace Attorney: Trials and Tribulations - "Detention Center ~ Elegy of the D
Post by: Maelstrom on July 05, 2018, 04:01:36 PM
did you ever get there
should we send out the search and rescue dolphins
Title: Re: [NDS] Phoenix Wright: Ace Attorney: Trials and Tribulations - "Detention Center ~ Elegy of the D
Post by: Sebastian on July 05, 2018, 04:58:27 PM
one of the only subs I didn't get to yet

In all seriousness, I'm not able to check notes yet. I will be soon though.
Title: Re: [NDS] Phoenix Wright: Ace Attorney: Trials and Tribulations - "Detention Center ~ Elegy of the D
Post by: Onionleaf on August 18, 2018, 07:58:21 PM
Bump? I'm ready to fix up the sheet whenever you are. :)
Title: Re: [NDS] Phoenix Wright: Ace Attorney: Trials and Tribulations - "Detention Center ~ Elegy of the D
Post by: Brassman388 on August 18, 2018, 08:49:07 PM
Very nice.

A couple of things though.

If you want to stay consistent with the the notes that are resounded, like in the first measure with the B, then the F-sharp in measure 4, and in measure 7.

Measure 5 thru 8 has a simple solution to avoid some of those intervals like the 11th in measure 12. Since you have the bottom staff in treble, what you could possibly do is move the second layer of the top staff to the bottom. For instance, in measure 10, the right hand is playing the melody of echoes, while the left hand is playing the E and G, then jumping to the octave on beats 3 and 4. That way, when you get to measure 12, the left hand is playing a minor 7th rather than the 11th that you currently have.

Measure 14 to the end the bass gets a little close at times to where notes are overlapping, but this just a preference. Nothing too critical so I wouldn't recommend on changing it since it's good as is.

Other than that, everything else looks good and sounds good.
Title: Re: [NDS] Phoenix Wright: Ace Attorney: Trials and Tribulations - "Detention Center ~ Elegy of the D
Post by: Onionleaf on August 18, 2018, 09:10:17 PM
Quote from: Brassman388 on August 18, 2018, 08:49:07 PMIf you want to stay consistent with the the notes that are resounded, like in the first measure with the B, then the F-sharp in measure 4, and in measure 7.

Sorry, I'm not entirely sure what you meant - were you referring to how the F-sharps in the right hand overlap with the left hand? Is there a particular way this should be annotated?

QuoteMeasure 5 thru 8 has a simple solution to avoid some of those intervals like the 11th in measure 12. Since you have the bottom staff in treble, what you could possibly do is move the second layer of the top staff to the bottom. For instance, in measure 10, the right hand is playing the melody of echoes, while the left hand is playing the E and G, then jumping to the octave on beats 3 and 4. That way, when you get to measure 12, the left hand is playing a minor 7th rather than the 11th that you currently have.

I assume you mean measures 10 onwards? This is a fair point and looks much tidier now, do let me know if I missed anything.

Thanks!
Title: Re: [NDS] Phoenix Wright: Ace Attorney: Trials and Tribulations - "Detention Center ~ Elegy of the D
Post by: Brassman388 on August 18, 2018, 09:16:30 PM
These notes.


(https://i.imgur.com/H8IU5WX.jpg)



You have the F-sharp in the bass and in spots it's played again in the top staff.
Title: Re: [NDS] Phoenix Wright: Ace Attorney: Trials and Tribulations - "Detention Center ~ Elegy of the D
Post by: Onionleaf on August 18, 2018, 11:30:49 PM
So do those notes require parentheses, or...? I sort of assumed that the performer will be able to interpret the sheet by playing those notes with the right hand and the pedal doing the rest of the work.
Title: Re: [NDS] Phoenix Wright: Ace Attorney: Trials and Tribulations - "Detention Center ~ Elegy of the D
Post by: Brassman388 on August 18, 2018, 11:39:24 PM
Quote from: Brassman388 on August 18, 2018, 08:49:07 PMIf you want to stay consistent with the the notes that are resounded, like in the first measure with the B, then the F-sharp in measure 4, and in measure 7.

It's nitpicky but not unorthodox. Up to you.
Title: Re: [NDS] Phoenix Wright: Ace Attorney: Trials and Tribulations - "Detention Center ~ Elegy of the D
Post by: Onionleaf on October 06, 2018, 11:03:36 PM
I'm back after >1 month of battling a constant stream of "stuff to get done" irl... Just wondering if there's any other improvements needed for this sheet?
Title: Re: [NDS] Phoenix Wright: Ace Attorney: Trials and Tribulations - "Detention Center ~ Elegy of the D
Post by: Libera on October 07, 2018, 01:22:15 AM
Good to see you back!  And no worries.  Looking back through the archives: this sheet sure has had a workout!  Hopefully we can get this finished pretty quickly (I think this sheet deserves it!).  Just some few minor things from me really:

Quote from: Brassman388 on August 18, 2018, 08:49:07 PMIf you want to stay consistent with the the notes that are resounded, like in the first measure with the B, then the F-sharp in measure 4, and in measure 7.
What Brassman means is that you use parentheses on the first B in the right hand and then later on when the notes overlap you don't use parentheses (such as the F# in bar 4).

Treble clef for the left hand in bars 10-13 seems unnecessary to me.  For most pianists it's easier to read bass clef for the left hand than treble and the difference in ledger lines is very small.

Other than those the notes look good.  I see that there was a big discussion on time signatures in the previous thread, so I'll go with the conclusion you reached from that I think.
Title: Re: [NDS] Phoenix Wright: Ace Attorney: Trials and Tribulations - "Detention Center ~ Elegy of the D
Post by: Onionleaf on October 08, 2018, 01:42:13 AM
Haha, yes this sheet has evoked much discussion in the past...
I changed that treble clef to a bass clef, thank you. Also feel free to correct me if I'm wrong, but I could not see a reason to add parentheses to the F# notes, as they still need to be played "over" the held/sustained note in the left hand (as opposed to the other notes with parentheses, where both hands are striking the note at the same time, so only one hand of the two is required).
Title: Re: [NDS] Phoenix Wright: Ace Attorney: Trials and Tribulations - "Detention Center ~ Elegy of the D
Post by: Libera on October 08, 2018, 02:01:38 AM
If that's your thinking then that's fine by me.

Looks good!
Title: Re: [NDS] Phoenix Wright: Ace Attorney: Trials and Tribulations - "Detention Center ~ Elegy of the D
Post by: Brassman388 on October 10, 2018, 02:36:34 PM
The parenthesis thing is alright, I guess.

But the notes getting smaller from m. 10 thru 13 is something you could do with dynamics and a couple of hairpins.

Fix that section and we'll be done here.
Title: Re: [NDS] Phoenix Wright: Ace Attorney: Trials and Tribulations - "Detention Center ~ Elegy of the D
Post by: Onionleaf on October 13, 2018, 10:58:24 PM
Sure, all fixed. :)
Title: Re: [NDS] Phoenix Wright: Ace Attorney: Trials and Tribulations - "Detention Center ~ Elegy of the D
Post by: Brassman388 on October 13, 2018, 11:48:18 PM
Right on right on!
Title: Re: [NDS] Phoenix Wright: Ace Attorney: Trials and Tribulations - "Detention Center ~ Elegy of the Detai
Post by: Zeta on October 13, 2018, 11:48:28 PM
This submission has been accepted by Brassman388 (https://www.ninsheetmusic.org/forum/index.php?action=profile;u=521).

~Zeta, your friendly NSM-Bot